Shake Your Tail Feather

Opulent ostrich-feather bolero jackets, flapper-style pheasant tail headbands, marabou trims…it’s enough to ruffle anyone’s feathers. The award for Autumn/Winter’s Unlikely Style Icon goes to Big Bird, because right now, no amount of feathery frou-frou is too much.

There were several fit birds (geddit?) at last season’s fashion week, but Burberry was definitely top of the pecking order. The fashion house, who never do things by halves (eg. Those full chain-mail coats which weigh the waifish wearer down) sent stand-out piece after stand-out piece down the runway. My favourites were the peacock coats and the decadent feather scarves.

 If you only pick one feathered friend to see you through the winter, opt for a marabou jacket, which will add a touch of film star glamour to any outfit. Black will transcend the seasons, but my impractical side is rather enamoured with the pastel coloured versions around at the moment. Vanessa Bruno’s deep violet affair is fabulously gothic, or bag the Topshop incarnation and spend the money you’ve saved on a fabulous night out, showing off your new jacket. It’s hard to spot the difference. Keep the rest of your silhouette sleek with skin-tight leather trousers or second-skin micro minis.

I’m in fashion heaven but dry-cleaning hell with all those part-silk, part-marabou dresses that have winged their way to Net-a-:Porter. That drop-waist! And is that lamé I see? Michael Kors, you spoil us. And if I was to liken Burberry’s half-bird, half-dress to a feathery creature, it would have to be a homing pigeon. Its home? My wardrobe. These divine creations are simply not made for the mundanity of everyday life (washing machines et al). They were made for the fashion week’s front row, not for the office party. Alternatively, opt for Dsquared’s version, the sheer bodice of which will direct your co-workers’ attention away from your feathery derriere to elsewhere…